it's confusing and it's too soon to even promise that i'll be around.
i don't know, circumstances can change so quickly.
it's not that i'm doubting how i feel, but more that i'm not sure i'll be able to cope with the way i feel over time.
times like these the old me would seek for an instant way out..
but that would only hurt the person i'd hate to see hurting ever.
i think too much, but talks about leaving have never been my specialty, i don't like goodbyes.
i have no idea what i'm meant to do, this is all so sudden and as much as i want to there's always a what if lingering..
what if i can't stand distance? i should've thought about this a month ago.
i know what i'd like to do and stick through it and be there for them but i'm scared i'll end up hurting them in the long run.
i'm scared, i really am, i need time but even all the time in the world would not make me decide, my head and my heart are pulling me towards completely different directions.
and everyone knows i've never been one to listen to my head.
maybe i'm just too selfish to give them up but am i really doing whats best for them in the long run?
i think i'm scared i won't be able to be what they need me to be :(
distance is a good thing, trust me you won't find anyone who endorses this more than i, but i guess i never realised that once you become emotionally attached then this can somehow change slightly.
maybe i'm just getting myself in too deep
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