the thirty-seventh

Today i was sitting by my bedroom window as it rained outside, i like the rain. I don't know there's just something captivating about it, how you can stare at the sky endlessly.. i like clouds too. Just sitting and forming shapes in your head.

It's amazing how you can stare at rain and know that at that very second there are literally millions and millions of tiny raindrops falling from the sky repeatedly, it almost makes you feel as if nothing can happen at that very moment, as if nothing can touch you.. you're in a bubble and the rain serves as a shield.

The smell after it has rained is also really lovely, like the smell of grass after a heavy thunderstorm, it's so fresh as if everything has been reborn, it makes you feel new.

Ha, smells.. i really like smells, it's one of the senses i really enjoy. I have quite an odd sense of preference in scents.. most people enjoy smelling flowers. I however enjoy the smell of permanent markers, petrol, the underground platforms of central station in sydney, the rain, daisy by marc jacobs and weirdly enough the smell when the vacuum has just been turned on even though it makes me sneeze like five seconds later. Yeah, these are basically my favourite scents.

Onto another topic, i'm listening to space oddity by david bowie right now, one of my all time favourite songs.. i don't know it makes me feel far away. I can just imagine myself running through tall green grass in the summer, without a care, making daisy chains.. in my grey converses and flowing purple dress. i miss life as it used to be, all childlike without responsibilities..

no that's not completely honest, because i still act like a child i refuse to grow up.. age in nothing but a number in my mind. Rather i miss how those around me used to act, i seem to be the only one still treating life as a childlike toy and not really taking many things seriously.

I still go on swings, see saws, rollerblade down my street, skateboard like a maniac in the neighbour's driveaway and attempt at ollies only to come home with scratched knees.

I always laugh at my mum's reaction in summer... my knees are worse than a 7 year old she says, covered in band aids. She tells me to start acting my age and stop being such a kid, that i laugh when i shouldn't and my jokes aren't funny, but hey i laugh at my own jokes so what? haha

I'm glad i have a best friend who is like me in spirit.. we plan picnics in the grass and laugh at the most inappropriate things, we do full routes of the shuttle bus and play mad free computer games in office works, we hang in the doorbell section of bunnings warehouse, and go for wicked bush walks in the middle of nowhere, we hang in the restricted section of the botanical gardens and walk along dangerous poles 3m above a rain forest, we constantly try to test if telepathy really works and attempt to self inflict pain on ourselves just so we can call the other out of nowhere and ask 'did you feel that at all?' hahaha and it never ceases to amaze me the amount of things we find to do without ever spending any money.

I wouldn't have it any other way :)

currently listening: space oddity - david bowie